Pandorum: Worst of 2009

Peter Martin over at Cinematical begins his misguided review of Pandorum with:

Really good sci-fi horror flicks don't come along too often.

Martin then makes the mistake of praising the film, when this quote alone could fulfill the review of the film completely. Pandorum is dense in every aspect: acting, writing, editing, direction. You name it, they got it wrong.

We are introduced to Bower (played boringly by Ben Foster - but this could be the fault of the script), as he awakens from hyper-sleep on the space ship Elysium, in the future sometime in the future 2000s (forgive me for not remembering the date - I was distracted by the other problems of the film). After five or ten minutes of the same old "Where am I? Who am I?" looks and physical stutters, Lieutenant Payton (played by Dennis Quaid, sometimes very stiff and other times too melodramatic, like the storyline) pops in with the same problem. So, after at least fifteen minutes of stuttering their own histories, we finally get to watch Bower crawl through scary tight spaces speaking to Quaid through an electronic device. Again, dull. So twenty or so minutes into the film, the creatures/aliens from The Descent creep in and start going crazy. Are you bored by my synopsis of the first act of the film? Yeah, I was too. So we'll just skip to the problems.

The amount of unoriginality of the film extends beyond its box office intake this weekend. It seems that screenwriter Travis Milloy thinks adding a few "motherfuckers" and "assholes" in a script makes it more intense and realistic. Instead, we're greeted with over-the-top use of bad language poured into already poor dialogue. We also encounter a huge amount of stereotypical, generic elements as well. One, for example, is near the end of the film. Our heroine finally reaches his destination - which happens to be the home of the alien creatures (didn't see that coming!) - and has to cross a bridge, while the creatures snooze beneath him. But wait! The bridge is falling apart, so he has to be extra careful not to fall AND be quiet so he doesn't wake up the monsters!

Also, director Christian Alvart seems to be confused. When there is a fight scene (which there are, scattered here and there to wake you up from your own hyper-sleep), he seems to choose every possible angle and asked his editor to cut between each angle every half second. So we're force-fed into five minutes of cut-cut-what-the-fuck-am-I-looking-at "action." We're also introduced to two supporting characters, one of which speaks another language, the other uses some foreign accent. Neither elements make sense.

Perhaps the worst acting (again, limited by the script) comes from Cam Gigandet, star of Never Back Down (2008) and Twilight (2008). Oh wait, you didn't see those? Me neither. He's the hot guy who takes his shirt off. And here he is again, introduced with all of his clothes off. But it's not that appealing because he opens his mouth a few times, sputtering out lines like a broken garbage disposal (with a few "motherfuckers" thrown in for good measure).

There are many, many more mistakes in the film (maybe I should bring my laptop into the theater next time to take lengthy notes), but I would be here until 2AM reciting them. However, there is a pleasing twist at the end of the film, but I would imagine it would be much more thrilling if the hour and thirty minutes preceding it kept me interested and entertained. Instead, I left the theater wishing I experienced my own hyper-sleep, awakening to find myself unaware of the two-hour trash my eyes just devoured.

Roman Polanski Arrested

From indieWIRE (and anywhere else you find movie news):

The Associated Press is reporting that director Roman Polanski has been taken into custody by Swiss police on the 1978 U.S. arrest warrant for having sex with a 13-year-old girl. Polanski was flying in to receive an honorary award at the Zurich Film Festival when he was detained late Saturday at the airport, organizers at the festival said in a statement. Zurich police since confirmed the arrest, but have refused to provide more details because he said it was a matter for the Swiss Justice Ministry. Switzerland and the U.S. have an extradition treaty dating back to the 1950s that is still in force.

Festival organizers said Polanski’s detention had caused “shock and dismay,” but that they would go ahead with Sunday’s planned retrospective of the director’s work. The Swiss Directors Association sharply criticized authorities for what it deemed “not only a grotesque farce of justice, but also an immense cultural scandal.”

This comes over a year after the release of Marina Zenovich’s documentary “Roman Polanski: Wanted and Desired,” which discussed how Polanski was the subject of a media onslaught after being convicted of statutory rape with a 13 year-old girl. He became the victim of a salacious mix of trumped up headlines, frenzied reporters and an attention-starved judge much more eager to satisfy his own desires to tap into the celebrity mix, than adjudicating justice. He fled the United States for France in the midst of this.

Polanski recently asked a U.S. appeals court in California to overturn a judges’ refusal to throw out his case. He claims misconduct by the now-deceased judge who had arranged a plea bargain and then reneged on it. The now 45-year-old victim, Samantha Geimer, who long ago identified herself publicly, has joined in Polanski’s bid for dismissal, saying she wants the case to be over. She sued Polanski and reached an undisclosed settlement.

Prior to today’s arrest, Polanski for many years avoided visits to countries that were likely to extradite him, such as the United Kingdom. He travelled mostly between France, where he resides, and Poland. As a French citizen, he was protected by France’s limited extradition with the United States.

Trailer: "A Single Man"

For the past few weeks now, I've been wondering when some good trailers would be showing up. And what I've found out this past weekend is that sometimes you just have to search for them. I've been looking into film festivals and things that have been picked up and searched good ol' YouTube for some of the trailers.

One of them is A Single Man. According to IMDb, the film is "a story that centers on an English professor who, after the sudden death of his partner tries to go about his typical day in Los Angeles." Colin Firth has never impressed me too a great extent, but it looks like this is his chance to nab the Oscar (or at least a nomination). And Julianne Moore looks beautiful as well; I love that first shot of her in the trailer. I can certainly see this at the Academy Awards, in Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actor, Best Actress, and Best Cinematography. Check it out for yourself over at YouTube.

Emmy Awards 2009: My Picks!

Hope Davis has my pick for Best Actress in a Drama Series. Who has yours?












The Emmy Awards are in a couple of hours.. here are my predictions and votes!

Outstanding Comedy Series
My pick: Weeds. This show has been full of surprises ever since its first season. From moving to the suburbs to Mexico (along with its opening credits), each episode has provided a new, twisted plot line. Where a typical twist or climax (such as a wedding or the birth of a child) may be built-up until the season finale, Weeds turns these tricks throughout a season, providing surprises throughout each episode.
Who will win? The Flight of the Concords just ended its run after its second season, but probably won't get the lady. Instead, 30 Rock might get it again, and frankly, I'm sick of it.

Outstanding Drama Series
My pick: Mad Men. Granted, I've only seen Season 1 (2 is in the mail!) but I still believe the show deserves another one. For one, it provided a committed audience to AMC and gave the network original programming. For another, it has an outstanding cast with incredible storylines and an interesting vision of the 1960s (and from what I hear, an honest one). And who doesn't like to look at the handsome Don Draper in his mysterious air of cigarette smoke?
Who will win? Mad Men.

Outstanding Made for Television Movie
My pick: Grey Gardens. It's the only one I've seen, and the performances really blew me away, however, all of these biopic films have a formula and fulfill it as unoriginally as the last. But, it was still extremely impressive because of the performances.
Who will win? Grey Gardens. Trust me. It will.

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series
My pick: Alec Baldwin. Listen, I'm tired of him winning it. But I'm not particularly interested in the other nominees. My second vote is for Jemaine Clement simply because Flight of the Conchords was so brilliant and original. But, hey, Alec Baldwin is hilarious.
Who will win? Alec Baldwin.. again.

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
My pick: Gabriel Byrne. PLEASE give this man his Emmy!! He won the Globe for it last year, and he was more than brilliant this year. His character was given much more to do than just listen to his patients; he had much more of a personal story through his personal life and work. Byrne carries this series brilliantly and deserves this award.
Who will win? I'm afraid Jon Ham might take it, but it was a surprise last year when Bryan Cranston took it for Breaking Bad. And, Michael C. Hall has been losing it every year since Dexter started, so this year might be his. Your guess is as good as mine.

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series
My pick: Toni Colette. I think The United States of Tara is such a well-written show with such a great cast, and no other actress could really carry this series like Toni Colette. She transforms into these different roles so beautifully and knows how to say so much with one glance in the mirror. And I'm tired of Tina Fey getting it.
Who will win? Toni Colette... please?

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series
My pick: Elizabeth Moss. She's go great on Mad Men, right? She's got such a great role and serves it so well.
Who will win? Saving Grace was recently canceled (or just quit?) so I think Holly Hunter may be receiving it, but who really watches that show, anyway? Maybe this is Moss' year?

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Miniseries or Movie
My pick: Drew Barrymore. I have never enjoyed Drew Barrymore's work or appreciated her as an actress until this film. She was absolutely brilliant and breathtaking in Grey Gardens and deserves an Emmy statue as recognition. Her co-star, Jessica Lange, deserves one as well (could there be a tie?), but I think Barrymore really showed her chops in this film.
Who will win? Either Lange or Barrymore. Personally, I think Jessica Lange will get it. And she deserves it.

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
My pick: Neil Patrck Harris. I've only seen a few episodes of How I Met Your Mother, so I can't reallybe the perfect critic, but I was empressed with NPH's work on the show. And he's hosting the awards, could this be a sign?
Who will win? NPH.

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
My pick: Michael Emerson. Emerson has really produced an incredibly mysterious character in LOST, a show that is already full of intensity and mystery. He's been nominated twice already, and while I do think that in previous seasons he was better, he still deserves the statue.
Who will win? You're guess is as good as mine.. but I wouldn't mind if John Slattery got if or Mad Men.

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series
My pick: Jane Krakowski. I think she had some really great moments this past season of 30 Rock and she really has great physical comedy, in addition to her lines.
Who will win? I think Kristin Chenowith might grab it this time, but we'll see.

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
My pick: Hope Davis. Hope Davis was an absolute surprise this past season of In Treatment. I have never been familiar with her work, but her appearance on In Treatment gave me another fantastic female role of which to be in awe (besides Dianne Wiest, also nominated, last year won). She really delved deep into this character and struck a chord with every line. Give this Emmy to her!
Who will win? I really believe it is Hope Davis this time. Not sure why; it just seems the others are more "Been there, done that" and Hope Davis is pushing her way out. She certainly deserves it.

And this is where I end my choices and predictions. Yes, I left out a few awards here and there; these are just my main concerns. Also, please ignore any spelling mistakes or name confusions - I'm typing this up quickly so I can get ready for the show!